Simply Handwritten: DIY Wedding Invitations and Envelope Etiquette

For my own wedding, I was not yet practicing calligraphy and was unaware of some of the proper ways to address certain household situations.  So as my mom and I came across questions while addressing the envelopes, we turned to Emily Post’s Etiquette and Google.  Since picking up the art, I have done the calligraphy for several weddings and even more questions popped up.  So here is a quick guide for common etiquette questions while addressing envelopes:

The host’s (party responsible for the majority of the costs) address is typically embossed or printed on the outer envelope.  This is an option that your printer will give you when ordering invitations.  My mom and I chose to go with an embossed return address and now my parents have a nice little embosser that  cost about $40.

          

A good rule of thumb for etiquette on invitations and addresses is “ladies first.” For instance, unmarried couples living together should be listed on separate lines  with the lady first.  If the couple is married with different last names the lady is listed first, but an “and” is added to join them.  Another place where this rule comes in handy is when the woman has a title such as Doctor or Captain.  She is listed with her title followed by her spouse and his title, joined by an “and.”

Personally, I think children make a wedding, but not everyone agrees and some enjoy an “adults-only” celebration.  If children are to be invited, their names are written under the names of the parents on the inner envelope, not on the outer envelope with the address.  If children’s names are not listed, then they are not invited.  The same rule goes for the “and Guest” which should be listed next to the recipient’s name on the inner envelope.

Yes (… in my opinion).  I find that an inner envelope makes the invitation look clean and clarifies exactly who you are inviting.  Sometimes outer envelopes are looked over quickly, leaving little time to notice that there is (or isn’t) an “and guest” written there.  With an inner envelope, your guest can be clear on whether or not they can bring a guest or if their children are welcome at the wedding.              While this isn’t necessary and all information can be included on the outer envelope, it’s a small fee to avoid some headaches down the road.   

Did I not cover your particular situation?  Did I mention Emily Post’s Etiquette? It really has everything you could ever need to know about etiquette and is free at the library!

Now that you know some etiquette on addressing, I’ll show you how we pulled together the invitation for my own wedding.  With the help of my mom and sister, we were able to replicate the the trifold invitations my husband and I loved at the stationary store but was just out of budget.  

Here is a break down of the supplies we used: 

● Trifold Pocket (to hold invitation, RSVP, and reception cards) – from here

● Ivory and Watermelon Card Stock (for printed materials) – from here

● 2.25” Card Stock Squares – from here

● “Belly Bands” (to hold it all together) – from here 

● Envelopes (inner, outer and rsvp) – from here 

● Trusted Printer – we used Charlottesville Press

● Talented Graphic Designer – I enlisted the help of my Sister, but Limefish Studio is always an option for you (wink wink). 

My sister designed the invitation and inserts to fit perfectly in the trifold card.  She also designed the monogram to place on our belly-band.  Don’t have someone in mind for the design work? You may like to give it a try on your own with Microsoft Publisher (30 day free trials) if you have patience, an eye for design, and a little computer literacy.  Just remember that the insert cards (reception, rsvp, change of date!) should be ascending sizes in order for their titles to be seen properly.

{ Step 2 } ASSEMBLE YOUR INVITATIONS IN THE TRIFOLD. 

Place your invitation on the card with a little glue and insert your rsvp and reception cards in the pocket.  For the invitation here, we used watermelon card stock behind the invitation for a border.  Also remember to have the rsvp envelopes pre-addressed (by your printer) and stamped.

The belly bands pull the invitation together.  First, you mount your monogram (which I noticed can also be ordered through Cards and Pockets) onto the 2.25” square.  Wrap the belly band around the card and secure with a small dab of glue.  Glue your mounted monogram in the middle to cover where the ends meet.